Make Me So Angry

This stupid marketing blog makes me so angered... It's just packed with wisdom such as:

"The Number One reason for any size business to advertise on TV, Radio, or in Print is to motivate your employees."

"Make the call to action the HERO of your ad as in--'Call Us Now! You will get right through to an experienced professional ready and able to assist you!'"

"You need a personality to be the "face" of your business. Not just a logo, a slogan, or a picture of your product."

I'm sure CocaCola Man would agree with the last one.
And the bit that made the soapbox anger happen:

"Think of every potential customer as 65 years old with poor eyesight. Even if your market is teenagers this rule applies... Whatever your art director recommends--insist the body copy type size be doubled or tripled. Afterall, THE objective is to be read! And, no white reverse type--ever."

THIS is what keeps me stuck at my desk until all hours of the night, re-doing perfectly fine, well thought out work. People are not going to read something that looks like it was designed for a dyslexic four year old and should be in a chew-proof plastic book that you can take in the bath. If the market is teenagers, design for teenagers, not the elderly... cause they ain't gonna appreciate it. Ain't appreciating it = aint gonna read it = dumb waste of my time.

No wonder you're selling freaking Leadership E-books with a picture of yourself on the front, not making millions of dollars in the advertising industry, Curs-ed Propaganda Man.